Time is something everyone has in common. Not one person has ever told me that they feel they have all the time in a day they need to do all the things they want to do.
Everyone feels like they wished they had more time.
We all know it is the only commodity that once it is spent, we can’t make more of.
We all have times in our lives, maybe even every day, where we feel up against the clock.
Not one person lives without the concept of a clock. Not even a baby. How many times have you heard the phrase “must be that time again”? And then when the clock is referenced, that person realizes that their own internal clock is telling them something important.
Not having enough time can be the biggest stressor in people’s lives.
Time can make our attitude or break our attitude, right?
Some of the most rude and offensive people I have ever been around or worked with are stressed about being pressed for time.
Let’s look at morning routines for an example:
You are running late leaving the house for work. Maybe it’s only 3 minutes but you could close that gap if you push the gas pedal a little harder so it’s fine, really. And then you come around the corner and quickly pump the brakes because the car in front of you is going so slow you can feel your hair graying. At this point you feel the blood pressure rise. There is a consequence for being late for work, right? The threat of our income can make us feel all kinds of feelings. So you follow too closely, maybe say some curse words, or maybe even pass in an unsafe zone. This isn’t your true nature but when the stress mounts you start doing and saying things that you would do otherwise.
Or how about this one parents:
Getting kids out the door in the morning…yup the dreaded late for school or daycare behavior…You tell them to hurry, they respond by moving slower. You explain everyone is in a hurry, they can’t find their other shoe. You race around feeling the stress building, they start crying and therefore do nothing you asked of them. You start raising your voice, they cry harder and now you are left to treating them like a ragdoll because they can’t even seem to stand up on their own. Now the morning is shot and so are everyone’s nerves. It’s going to be hard for your children to learn and just as hard for yourself to shake it off and work with purpose and joy.
No one wants to live like this. It’s simply our humanity and unlearned skills that leave us grasping at straws.
But there is a better way. You can learn new tools that will empower you, and in turn, empower your kiddos.
Time management tools for the whole family can free up your time as your kiddos start to become even more independent.
Could you imagine your child getting out of bed in the morning with a smile and then carrying that smile through tackling their whole morning routine independently?
It is possible!
But it comes from a place of example. If you don’t illustrate this with authenticity, your kids will never get on board too.
How would it feel to go through your day and not feel the pressure of the clock?
What would it mean to you to have a set of skills and tools available to make the clock work for you?
What could it be like to empower your kids to have the same tools?
Can you feel the peace that could live in your home by making the time to learn these skills?
I know it’s possible because I have done this with my own family.
I was blessed enough to have an 11 year gap between our last 2 kids. It’s like raising 2 separate families!
With the first 2 kids, I was that stressed mom who was always yelling at them to hurry up, rushing from one thing to another like my hair was on fire. I would get frustrated when my rushing would slow them down and that just increased my frustration. See the vicious cycle happening?
And as they got older, I started to see how this was affecting their attitude in so many areas of their lives. I was young and had no clue how something as small as rushing them out the door in the morning could have such a severe impact on how they viewed managing their lives.
I started to see how they waited for me to tell them to do more and more. They stopped taking responsibility for their time and this led to them taking less responsibility in every other area.
When I learned better time management techniques, I thought that just doing these things in front of them was enough.
Even though the older boys are grown now, they still struggle with some time management stuff.
Our little surprise who is now 6, doesn’t struggle the same way the older boys do. He is empowered to care for himself and his things in a timely manner that allows him to head out the door with a smile and a heart full of joy in the morning.
And it isn’t cutting into anyone’s sleep to make it a reality.
So often I hear from parents that they don’t have the time to do a time management class.
I would say that they don’t have the time not to.
If I would have had these resources when the older boys were little, I would have spent less time in their teenage years battling with them.
I often think back with some regret for the time that was wasted because we didn’t make the time to figure it out sooner.
But I am grateful for the chance to make things different for each of my children now. And to show them that having the strength of character to change something that isn’t working is a valuable quality.
Time is going to pass anyway…don’t let the stress of it passing be the reason you don’t LOVE the way you spend your time. Your family feels it. You feel it.
You all deserve to spend your time more peacefully.